3 years already. We are so blessed.

Especially for Stephen:

Today marks 3 years of marriage for us. I can't believe it's been three, wonderful years already. You are truly my best friend and I could not imagine life with anyone else by my side. God has directed us to quite a few places of ministry in these three years and not living near family, we have just had each other. I am thankful for how our experiences have only made our bond stronger. This 3rd anniversary celebration will be quite different with an almost 7 week old little one, but I wouldn't want it any other way. My hair might be a mess all day, a shower may not be guaranteed, and my "perfume" might smell exactly like baby spit up but we are together and that is what is important. I am just so blessed that you love me the way that you do. So blessed! I'm looking forward to 183 more years and just pray so much that our marriage can be an example of love, commitment, and faithfulness for our children.

This morning I was reflecting on some our very first moments together when we were so completely unaware of what was ahead for us and smiling at what God had planned all along:

I never could have guessed that agreeing to meet at Zaxby's for lunch before working camp that summer would be the first of many meals shared together.

I never could have guessed that you waking me up backstage after worship the night I was sick would be the first of many nights of waking me up when I'd fallen asleep on the couch while watching TV. I never could have guessed that being paired for the "Amazing Race" fellowship at camp would be the first of many watched Amazing Race seasons together or that teaching Bible study each morning next door to each other would just be the start of our years of ministry together. I never could have guessed that by running out to the car at camp to say hello to your parents, sister, and grandmother, I was actually saying hello to my amazing, future family. I never could have imagined that when you slipped a balloon ring on my finger just being silly at camp, that you would only a few months later slip an engagement ring on my finger. I never could have guessed that when the staff squeezed into the seats on the subway on the way from Philadelphia to New York and I was squeezed in ever so close to you, that I would share many more moments right by your side as your wife feeling just as safe and wonderful as I did in that moment on the subway.

I cherish the phone calls after camp every night sharing our hearts with one another and trying to convince my Dad that you just considered me a good friend. I never could have guessed that you were the one that he had been praying for for me all along. And then the night on the phone that you told me "I know I'm going to marry you..." and I knew in my heart that you were absolutely right.

I cherish those moments of falling in love and just want to spend all of my years continuing to fall in love with the amazing man that you are, Stephen.

I have loved every moment:

From camp,

To our first date,

To playing in the leaves,

To falling in love.

From our engagement,

to our wedding,

to our year in New Orleans,

and Wake Forest,

and Georgia.

From anniversaries spent by ourselves,

to anticipating life with our baby boy,

to welcoming our precious, son.

I wouldn't change a single thing! I would marry you a million times over! Happy 3rd anniversary. I love you for my whole life. :)

Love, Kassi Bee

Mommy, Mommy Crocket...

I recently discovered that the sixth week is the peak of crying for all babies. Stephen and I came into week 6 blissfully unaware of this fact...Crying? We had barely even heard James cry...well, at least until this week, his sixth week. In fact, because his cry was usually so infrequent and so subdued that when he did cry it was almost a sweet, precious sound and by feeding him, changing him, or putting him to sleep we could instantly calm him.

If I was ever concerned that "he doesn't know how to cry" or "his cry won't be loud enough to let us know if something is wrong" (some of the oh so funny things I told Stephen in the first six weeks of James' life), boy was I wrong! He knows how to cry and boy does he have some lungs! But this week his cry has become frequent, loud, and heart breaking and even when he is fed and has a dry diaper he still cries.

So, as you can imagine we have been trying just about everything to console him. Baths work well but he can only sit in the bath for so long. Bouncing does help but then it brings on spit up and more crying and more bouncing and more spit up and more crying...it's a vicious cycle. Then, we discovered last night that if I carried him around in his infantino baby carrier that he would eventually settle down. I want to paint a picture of our evening because looking back on it now it is actually pretty humorous:

For several hours I walked laps around our house with James in the baby carrier. I tried to walk in a "rhythmic, swaying motion" as I walked laps around the house. I had his "sleep sheep" that plays soothing sounds similar to the womb attached to the carrier. James had one hand on his sleep sheep and one hand on my shirt holding on to both for dear life. I had one hand on his pacifier and one hand on my "What to Expect the First Year" book looking up "fussy" in the index all while walking laps in a rhythmic motion around the house...for hours. And in my moment of desperation the Davy Crockett song popped into my head and so while walking laps in a rhythmic motion holding on to a pacifier and a book looking up the word "fussy" in the index I began to sing instead of "Davy Crocket"..."Mommy, Mommy Crocket...king of the wild frontier" over and over. I don't even know what that means...and I promise that normally I sing sweet lullabies and hymns. But somehow the combination of all of those things worked....and believe me we are willing to do just about ANYTHING to make James happy. If only you could have been a fly on the wall last night... While all of this was going on my precious husband (words are not even enough to describe how precious) was picking up around the house so that when James finally did collapse from exhaustion, we could too.

We will most certainly be singing "Mommy, Mommy Crocket..." or "Daddy, Daddy Crocket" anytime James is fussy...if it makes him happy. :)

Rattlesnake Roundup

As promised here is a recap of last weekend and the Rattlesnake Roundup (I'm trying to get this done before James wakes up so I apologize for any typos):

Well, we had heard about the Rattlesnake Roundup for some time and even though people had tried to describe it to us you really just have to experience it for yourself (but I'll do my best). It's a pretty big deal in this small town and we knew that we didn't want to miss the chance to go when it rolled around. James got to experience his first Rattlesnake Roundup at just 5 weeks old and even got a "shout out" on a local TV station from our friend Adam who was a commentator for the parade. Adam also gave us a signed picture for James from Miss Georgia. I'm happy to announce that I showed James the picture and he just yawned at it which means that he will hopefully only love Mommy for a few more years!

There was a parade that we walked to from our house that was one street up complete with clowns, tractors, floats, motorcycles, beauty queens, and even a band. James slept in the carrier for the whole time! (It makes us wonder why we whisper when he's alseep at home when Harley Davidson motorcycles didn't wake him up..) There was also a "fair" type thing with lots of booths and all the great fried food everyone loves at our Wildlife Club. The main attraction that had a large crowd gathered was, of course,...The Rattlesnakes. We never got too close!

We also got to enjoy spending time with Aunt Leah, Cousin Jonathan, Nana, and Grandpa who were all visiting for the weekend. I know they enjoyed the Rattlesnake Roundup too! ;)

We'd love to have any of you curious readers out there visit us next March if you'd like! Just let me know!

Here are a few pictures from the weekend:

Goals

I've decided that I need to set some goals of things that I would like to accomplish each day and maybe by writing them down I'll be more accountable. I'm great with lists. I love scratching things off my list and sometimes add things to the list that I already accomplished that day before I made the list just so I can immediately scratch something off... I know some of you understand this kind of thinking.

for example...

Fold the clothes

See, It really does feel so good! But back to the goals..

After caring for James and giving the time I need to him daily (because caring for him just really isn't even a goal...):

1. I want to be faithful to spending time studying God's Word each day. Before James was born I was doing the Experiencing God study and since he's been born I'm sad to say that I haven't touched it. I could say I'm too busy or too tired but it would just be an excuse. If I have time to write this blog update then I have time to study God's Word and if I'm praying that James would grow up to love God's Word then I need to show him through my life that I love God's Word too.

2. I want to start exercising again (something else I haven't done since James was born). I've decided that since I'm at home a lot more and when we get out to walk it's usually more at a leisurely pace, I want to try Jillian Michaels's 30 Day Shred and hopefully I can be committed to keep with it for 30 consecutive days. I'm not too too far off from my pre-pregnancy weight but my body is just very different now and nothing feels just right. I can't wear maternity pants forever to avoid wearing pants that are tighter than I would like. So before buying new pants, I'm going to give this a go.

3. I want to try couponing. I'm not ready to completely dive in yet because I know that there is almost a science to it (doubling up on coupons and going to multiple stores), but I at least want to start clipping/printing some and saving some money when we can. Hopefully I can perfect the art of couponing the way many people have later down the road.

4. I want to start making a weekly menu again. When I wasn't working a full time job and coming home to do work some more, I really enjoyed being in the kitchen. Now that my life has changed and I won't be teaching, I'm ready to start really cooking again and even try some new recipes. If anybody has any good recipes, please send them my way.

5. I want to keep up with the household duties: laundry, dishes, cleaning. I know just doing a little each day will keep it from feeling overwhelming.

6. I want to watch less T.V. (which I'm already doing) and read more. I love reading and I think it would be something that I could do for myself that I would really enjoy.

7. I want to help Stephen in any way I can: with ministry, with errands, with just listening or giving him a break when he needs one.

Well, 7 daily goals is probably enough for now. We'll see how it goes. :)

I want to post about our weekend soon but I need to get some pictures and maybe even a little video clip together. We had the Rattle Snake Roundup in Claxton and got to share it with Stephen's parents, Stephen's sister Leah, and her little boy Jonathan. I know that Leah is going to go back to New Orleans and tell JP how much they are missing out on and how they need to move here ASAP. ;) The rattle snake roundup probably is the biggest thing that happens in our small town and I will share more about it next time...

My new full-time job...

James will be five weeks old on Friday and it seems that life is starting to feel normal again. We've adjusted to our new schedule (or lack of schedule) and it's hard to imagine what life was like before we brought our little boy home. I love our family of three!

I was given an eight week maternity leave from teaching (with an extra week because of a week long winter holiday) and so technically I would be returning in just four short weeks to finish out my year in fourth grade with only five weeks left in the school year. But I'm so thankful to say that I am not going to be returning to finish out the year....and I won't be going back next year either. I am going to take a few years to stay at home, help Stephen out more with the children and youth at church, and spend my days taking care of James! I feel so very grateful and blessed!

We live in a very small town (and I'm not even sure how many people read the blog), but I guess the news will get around eventually one way or another. I'm definitely sad that I will not be seeing some very wonderful people on a daily basis that I have had the privilege of teaching/working with and I will miss some very precious children as well. However, as my pregnancy progressed I began to wonder how hard it would be to go back to work. And when James was born and I held him for the first time, I didn't know how I would ever be able to leave him. I knew in my heart that I would be unhappy if I returned always wishing I was with James and as a result I wouldn't be able to give myself fully to teaching. I also knew that after working a full day and them coming home to do lesson plans and grading, I would never have the time that I needed to give to Stephen and James (the time and energy they deserved) and there is no such thing as a part-time teaching job or a teaching job with flexible hours. Daycare would be our only option. And I knew that there are several wonderful certified teachers in our school subbing daily because they desperately need a job and there are none available because of the economy. I knew that my leaving would be an answer to prayer for one of them. (Not to mention that I've worked in several daycares and many people do not love and care for other people's children as they should...that thought made me feel crazy enough...)

I was scared to have to break the news to our principal and assistant principal last week even though I knew I was making the right decision. I prayed that they would receive the news well and I was amazed at how they encouraged me in my decision and told me that they knew the Lord would provide for our family as we took this step. (I thank God for two of the godliest examples I have ever seen in a public school and am so grateful that I was able to work under them this year!)

I recognize that the Lord will provide for us in this new chapter and already has in so many ways! I am thankful for how he directed our steps to Georgia to this new place of ministry because this time last year while in seminary full-time staying at home with James would never have been possible. I recognize that this is a privilege and I pray that I would never take it for granted. I also want to make a commitment (and ask that you hold me accountable) to never complain about challenging days at home because I know there are many mothers out there that would give anything to have challenging days at home with their kids rather than being at work.

So, I guess it's official...I'm trading in my teacher bag for burp cloths and bottles! It's an exciting change and I praise God for it! :)

Letter to James at One Month

Letter From Mommy:

Dear James,

I cannot believe that one month has already passed since the day that you arrived. The second that I laid eyes on you and I held you for the first time, I experienced a love that I have never known before. My heart just overflowed with love for you. Our life is so different now and so perfect at the same time. You have filled our life with so much joy. You are so sweet, patient, and wonderful in every way. Every second with you is precious to me. I love to watch your big eyes as you look at the world with a curious expression. I love when you grip my hand or shirt or you touch my face safe in your Mommy's arms. I even love to watch you sleep and listen to all the sweet sounds that you make as you dream.

I am far from perfect and I know that at times I'll make mistakes along the way, but I want you to know that you can count on me. I will be here for you always - when you are happy, when you are sad, when you skin your knee and need someone to dry your tears. If you are ever scared or feel alone, know that I am here. Know that I am your biggest fan and am cheering you on every step of the way.

I know you are going to grow up way too fast but no matter how old or how big you get, I will always love you and love you more every single day. I will always love your Daddy and will be devoted to him too. He is a wonderful man and I hope that you will grow up to be just like him. I commit to pray every day for you and pray that I can be the kind of mother that you need.

Never forget that you are so loved and so wanted and there is nothing that I wouldn't do for you. And never forget that Mommy loves you, Daddy loves you, and God loves you. Sweet James, you are a precious gift and we praise God for your life!

I love you forever,

Mommy

Letter From Daddy:

James,

You have taught me so much in this first month of your life. I cannot imagine life without you now. I am so happy and blessed that your have joined your mom and I as a part of our family and the years that we will share together will be wonderful, exciting and full of love. The main thing that you have taught me in this past month, you taught me the very first day, hour, minute and second of your life, and for this I am eternally grateful to you. You taught me how our Heavenly Father loves us. From the moment I laid eyes on you, I loved you, and that is a love that will never stop or that you could ever change. That love is unconditional and I am so glad that you showed me that because in your very first moments of life your strengthened my relationship with God.

I will not be able to promise you much in this life, but there are three things that I can promise you. First, I will always love Jesus. Not only will I always love Him, but I promise to model a good relationship with Him so that you can follow that model and grow to follow our Savior. I promise to always lead our home in a Christlike manner and as the Spiritual Leader of our household, you can always count on me to look to Jesus for guidance on the way our family should go.

Second, I will always love your mother. We spent three years together before you arrived into our lives and in that time we had highs and lows. We used all of those experiences to grow closer together as a couple and I can assure you, that will never change. We will be together for our whole lives and you can always count on the fact that we love each other and will be husband and wife for as long as we are your Dad and Mom,

Third, I will always love YOU! Nothing will ever change this fact. Nothing you do, nothing you say, or nothing that happens will ever make me love you less. I will always be there for you. If you need help with homework, I will be there. If you need to know how to throw a baseball, I will be there. If you want to talk, I will be there. If you want to laugh, I will be there. If you need to pray, I will be there. You can always count on me because I love you!

I am your Dad, you are my son and I pray we have a relationship that Glorifies our Heavenly Father and His Son! I love you, James!

Daddy

A Clean Baby

Bath time with James was so fun tonight. Stephen and I were just captivated by this squirmy, peeing, round-bellied little boy. After we dried him and dressed him, I just sat and fed

him and could have breathed that sweet baby smell all night.

This picture makes me laugh. I just love this little face. Even his pitiful faces just make my heart melt. What did I ever do before James? I just cannot get over him. :)