The 21st Time

I was challenged by this song this morning. Lord, help me to be the body today. I've been guilty of "not seeing" too many times!

Our Top Ten

We just got back from spending a few weeks in Birmingham, Alabama. Stephen took the youth to M-Fuge, we had our first family vacation with James, and got to see lots of family! We had lots of time to talk and lots of time traveling in the car which was even longer with Mr. James Man who does NOT love his car seat anymore. So, we talked about all sorts of things while driving and one conversation was about the baby products that we have used most/have been most helpful to us. I thought it would be fun to post a list of our top ten baby products and hopefully it will be helpful to some of you out there that may need these for your own babies or for friends about to have a new baby.

Here are Our Top Ten Baby Products (in no particular order):

1. The Nap Nanny - Here is a link to check it out at http://napnanny.com/ - I cannot tell you how much this has helped our family. James has reflux and his frequent spitting up even while he sleeps woke him up SO often (screaming and crying). We learned quickly that he cannot sleep flat on his back and being elevated in the Nap Nanny has greatly reduced his spitting up while he sleeps. It is a little costly but we have definitely gotten our money's worth out of it. We can also tell you two ways to swaddle and still sleep secured in the Nap Nanny if you are interested.

2. Burp Cloths - I know this isn't a new product but we have used burp cloths SO often and do not go anywhere without them. There is no way to know in advance how much your little one will spit up but ours does frequently and I would encourage every new parent to have some. (We probably have at least 20.) The thicker the absorbency the better!

3. Pack n Play - The Pack n Play is great for traveling and also for placing around the house for your little one to sleep wherever you would like. Before James was born I thought he would always sleep in his room and I would just use the baby monitor, but I had no idea just how much I would want him close to me. James is now five months old and I have to confess that he STILL sleeps in our room. He doesn't sleep through the night yet and we have found that we get more rest if we can get to him more quickly, feed him, and get him back to sleep. I know it's not for everyone and that is okay (parenting is about finding out what is right for you and your baby) but it's the best decision for us. We put his Nap Nanny right inside his pack n play in our room and he is sleeping so well now. Also our Pack n Play came with a newborn napper attachment that he slept in until he literally could not fit in it anymore. It kept him snuggly and elevated. I loved it!

4. White Noise CD - We downloaded white noise sounds off of i-tunes and burned them to a CD. We repeat the same track all night long of a flowing stream. It simulates the womb and helps James sleep better. It helps us sleep better too!! I have to turn it off in the morning or it is impossible to wake up. It is seriously the best 5 bucks we've ever spent!

5. Sleep Sheep - The sleep sheep attaches to our car seat and plays white noise sounds so James can sleep better while on the go! There is a larger one also that attaches to the crib at home but it has to be restarted every 45 minutes so we just stick with the CD on repeat.

6. Summer Swaddle blanket - I highly recommend swaddling and this is a blanket that will keep James swaddled (usually) all night. We have just moved up to the largest size and soon it will be time to wean him out of it, but if you want your baby to sleep longer and feel more secure while they sleep this is one way to do it! One word of advice: just stick with cotton (no fleece) even if your baby is born in the winter. In the south it just never gets cold enough for the fleece. I was/am always afraid of overbundling/overheating James.

7. Moby Wrap/Sling - Our baby loves to be carried and worn during the day in the moby wrap or sling (these are the two that I have but I know there are many more out there). I usually only wear him at most for a few hours (when I'm out and about or busy around the house) but he feels safe, is able to see and experience the world, and also takes some really great naps. He is content in the stroller for a short time but when he is worn is content for hours. This is another product I thought I would only use with James as an infant but discovered that he loves it and there are lots of benefits (even health benefits) for him. He's five months old (and at least 15 pounds) and I still prefer to wear him rather than push him in the stroller.

8. Medela Breastpump - Whether you are staying at home or returning to work, if you plan on breastfeeding I would really recommend having a pump. I thought I would use it for convenience and for bottles on the go but found out there were times I really felt like I needed it. This is the only one I've tried, but it's worked great for me.

9. Sophie the Giraffe Teether - My mother-in-law gave us this at a shower but it wasn't until James started teething that we realized how great this teether actually was! It is easy for a baby to hold because it's slender and just the right shape for chewing on. I know it sounds silly but it really is better than other teethers out there! James always prefers this one.

10. The Baby Book and Happiest Baby on the Block - I have never read more and on a subject that is as dear to me as my baby. There is lots out there and everyone has books that are most helpful to them. These may not work for everyone, but for me these two have been the best. The Happiest Baby on the Block is great for learning to soothe the baby in the earliest weeks and during the colicky period (you need to know the 5 s's because they work!!). The Baby Book by Dr. Sears is hands down my favorite and has been helpful to me now and will continue to be for the first few years of James' life. It has information on all kinds of subjects from sleeping to feeding and has given me the most confidence in feeling comfortable to parent from my heart.

My advice is to find the books that are best for you and that offer the advice that you feel most comfortable with -- but really every decision you make when parenting your baby should be based on your unique, individual baby. There is no perfect formula for being a parent. I put way too much pressure on myself these first few months feeling that if my baby didn't act like most babies, something must be wrong with how I was parenting him. Pray for God's wisdom, parent from your heart, and follow's your little one's cues. Don't feel guilty to do things differently than the other mothers around you. (And don't be judgmental of the way someone else parents...there is truly no "Right" way to do it. Every family situation, parent, and baby is different.)

I hope this list will be helpful to new mothers out there! I would love to hear about products that worked for you or products that may be helpful as James very soon enters the world of eating, crawling, walking...oh my!!

We're Asking Him....

I have never posted twice in one day but my boys are napping (we're on vacation) and I did promise to be better about posting.

This post is a prayer request and while it might seem vague it's just a request that we would seek God for our future. It's easy to try and make plans about what our life and future should look like. However, God has been revealing to Stephen and I recently through different things/people that our plans and picture of the future may not be God's for us. And that we should ask Him: Where does HE want us in ministry? What kind of ministry would HE desire us to be in to reach others for HIM? What is HIS plan and timeline for our finishing seminary? How many children does HE want us to have and when does HE want us to add to our family? How many of those will be children that HE would have us birth from our heart..children that are praying they would one day have a family to take them to their forever home? How does HE want us to raise our children and school our children? The list goes on and on....

I know it isn't a new concept to just ask God for his direction for our future but we are just at a place that we need to be reminded to do that. Please pray for us about this!

³Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." ¹⁴Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. ¹⁵Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that." James 4:13-15

So Many Firsts

James has had a lot of firsts lately!! We've tried to document them all on camera. I thought I'd share some of them with all of you! It's exciting but he's growing up so fast! It makes my heart swell with pride and at the same time makes me realize how quickly time passes and how precious every moment is!

He had his first long car trip that should have been a little over 5 hours but ended up being a little over 9 hours. We did NOT capture that on camera! :)

His first swim in a big pool and....

His first swim in a little pool.

His first cereal (which he loved)!

His first Father's Day!

His first M-Fuge (just a few short visits for now).

His first trip to Nana and Grandpa's in Alabama.

His first vacation and zoo trip!

First time riding in the stroller without the infant carrier.

His first train ride and....

his first carousel ride!

And if that wasn't enough, he decided he would roll over too - on Tuesday night, June 29 (that's just for me to go back and put in the baby book later). But not the easy way, of course. He pushed himself up onto his hands and feet (with his little bottom in the air) and then fell to the side and rolled all the way over. We got the second and third time on video (the first time caught us by surprise.) Hopefully, Stephen can show me how to post the video when we get home and you will hear my voice at decibels never heard before but it was so cute and sweet (him...not me)!!

Thanks for reading and loving us and our little boy! I know that James is all I post about now but it's our life at the moment! :)

4 months already...

James is quickly approaching five months so I wanted to go ahead and post another update of all the changes that happened by the fourth month. I am going to try and be better about posting more frequently too! I have not been blogging much but stay tuned because when we get back from Birmingham in a week, I will have lots to blog about and pictures to share!! (I may post 6 different posts at once!)

- James weighed 15.2 pounds and measured 25.5 inches long at his 4 month checkup.

- He is still wearing mostly 3-6 month clothes and is in size 2 diapers.

- He is really starting to fall into a predictable routine. He wakes up around 7:00 every morning and then takes a nap at 9:00, 12ish, 3ish, and a short cat nap in the early evening. His naps are usually a little over an hour now which is great for him! He takes a bath at 8:00 and is asleep no later than 9:00.

- He is eating about every 3 hours on most days. I have found when he gets out of his routine or what is familiar (such as traveling) he wants to eat more frequently until he adjusts.

- He is still waking up at least once during the night for a feeding but usually goes right back to sleep. He is so curious during the day that I think he doesn’t fill up but is able to get a great feeding in the middle of the night with no distractions.

- We tried feeding him rice cereal a few times. He definitely shows almost all the signs of being ready for it including pulling the spoon to his mouth when I bring it towards him but it has to be really, really liquidy for him to really eat it and I have decided to just wait a little closer to 6 months when he will start other baby food as well. The doctor said he is getting everything he needs as far as nutrition in the milk.

- James is a happy, content, and curious baby. He really intently watches the world around him and tries to absorb it all.

-He loves interacting with people. He doesn't mind to be held by others and always has plenty of smiles for everyone. Mommy really makes him smile and Daddy really makes him laugh. We are recognizing that he recognizes us as different people that meet different needs for him. At first I was sad that I wasn't the "funny" parent but I recognize that he seeks me for comfort and that is equally as wonderful.

-He loves books and tries to help Mommy turn the pages. He tries to read when we read and sing when we sing. He talks a lot especially in the morning and makes lots of “M” sounds. Every time he says “mmmmm” I say “Mama”. Ha!

-He is able to sit up on his own for a few seconds at a time and is trying hard to get in the crawling position. Sometimes he brings his legs underneath him and then pushes them back out and looks like a little worm moving on the floor. He is still not rolling over but trying very hard. I definitely think he could do it and will surprise himself the day that he does. He gets almost there and then stops! (Just this week he has almost done it but I stop him scared that Stephen will miss it while he's at M-Fuge with the youth.)

- He loves splashing in the water and loves hearing the water running in his bath because he knows it’s bath time. He had his first dip in the big pool and baby pool. He seemed a little confused at first but definitely warmed up to them in the end.

-His first tooth that was coming in on the side (or so we thought) but we found out it was actually not a tooth but an emerging cyst that means teeth are on their way. When the cyst wore off, I was actually relieved but I think it’s a matter of time before the teeth start popping through. He is chewing on everything and has days/nights that he is really uncomfortable.

- He also loves his feet this month!!! He is now pulling them up and into his mouth!!

There are probably so many more things that I could say but that is just a little list of all that is happening in his world and ours. James is just an absolute joy and am so blessed to be his Mom! I knew I would adore him but I never could have predicted just how much. I am absolutely attached! This month by God's grace I am finally feeling more confident and am so thankful. I am starting to pay much less attention to books, schedules, the clock, or what people say babies should be doing at this stage and pay much more attention to his voice and his cues. I am reminding myself that he is a unique creation with unique needs and won't be exactly like any other baby in the world because God made him that way. I hope we are building communication even now that will continue into his teens and adulthood. God is teaching me to trust Him first and then to listen to my son's voice. I hope that when I respond to James cues with love, that I am earning his trust and that he knows he can count on me and that I'll be there! I am so thankful!

Confessions of a Mommy and a 3 month update!

I am way too hard on myself. Always have been. Enter James 14 weeks ago and I realize even more just how ridiculously high my expectations are of myself. I know some of you out there can relate. I'm learning this perfectionism is actually an insecurity (I'm reading So Long Insecurity by Beth Moore right now and learning how I need to surrender this to God...but I digress.) I'm hard on myself partly because of my personality (typical first child syndrome) and partly because of the roads I've traveled but either way God is showing me that I need to lay it all at His feet. I told Stephen last night that I so badly want to be such a good Mom that I'm struggling with false guilt. Again, I know some of you can relate...

For example, I practically eat my meals now in two bites because I don't want James to have to play alone for too long. I worry when I think he doesn't get enough sleep and then worry when I'm afraid he's slept too much. I wrestle one day with thinking he's eating too often and the next day I'm afraid that he hasn't eaten as much as he should have that day. I struggle with should I be more scheduled with him or am I too scheduled....the list goes on an on. But at the end of the day, he's happy, he's growing and developing, and he certainly is far from undernourished. I need to look at all that IS going right thanks to God's grace and focus less on what could possibly go wrong. Oh, it's hard being a Mom.... oh, I have never understood more how much I just need Jesus daily.

Please pray for me about this - that I will just trust God with every detail of James' life and not worry. God has entrusted me to be his mother and He will equip me to care for him in a way that glorifies Him. I need to stop trying to be "perfect" and just enjoy each day and whatever it brings.

On a much happier note: James is 14 weeks old! 3 1/2 months he has blessed our lives. And he is doing so much:

- From a rough estimation at home, I believe he weighs a little over 14 pounds and is at least 25 inches long. He is in size 3 to 6 months clothes and we just moved him up to Size 2 diapers.

- He occasionally sleeps from about 8:30 until 6:30 AM (what we call sleeping through the night) but he usually wakes up once in the early AM to eat and will then go back to sleep until 7 or 8.

- He still sleeps in our room in the pack-n-play. I have said we'll move him to his crib when he is consistently sleeping through the night but I just honestly love having him close.

- He is "talking" all the time and has learned he can scream now. He loves hearing his voice and tries to take part in conversations. He also sings with us too and right now his singing voice is sort of a scream but it is the most beautiful song to me. :)

- He has definitely found his hands. He is bringing toys up to his mouth and putting them in his mouth. He also loves putting his whole fist in his mouth.

- He loves batting toys, reaching for toys, and pressing buttons on toys that make noise. I think he is starting to realize that his pressing the button makes the noise and it is like an instant reward for him.

- He is stretching his meals out a little more now, probably close to 3 hours apart. He also naps often throughout the day, but never for a really long stretch. I have tried different ways to try and get him to sleep longer, but I have come to the conclusion that this just may be what he prefers. This is an area that I just need to let go of and not stress over. It will all work itself out.

- He is really able to hold his head up for longer periods of time now. He sits in the Bumbo and even tries to sit up when he is reclined. He has just started using the exersaucer and loves it because he has very strong legs and loves to jump.

- He smiles and laughs all the time. He loves smiling at himself in the mirror.

- He is splashing a lot in the bath tub. Stephen has to add water in the middle of the bath sometimes because James has splashed it all out.

- His favorite songs are hymns. We sing these with him every night before he goes to bed after reading "Just In Case You Ever Wonder" by Max Lucado. I have noticed that he has really started to pay attention to books now while we read.

- He is enjoying tummy time more now. He is able to raise his lower half and upper half simultaneously and looks like a little super hero.

Thanks for your continued prayers for us. Thanks also for your love and care for our little man!

I want to Rediscover You...

Quite often it seems that James and I find ourselves having church at home on Sundays. It is definitely not ideal but some days it seems to work out that he will be ready to eat as soon as church starts and it would be much easier to stay at home and watch a podcast rather than go to church to then go immediately find a quiet, private place to nurse.

Yesterday I pulled up a David Platt sermon to watch on my computer while I was feeding James. James would hardly eat he was so distracted and watched intently with me. I know his fascination was the lights and sounds on the computer but it did make me voice a prayer that he would learn to listen for God's voice one day just as intently as he focused on my laptop screen as we watched a sermon together.

I learn so much from James. I love the stage that he is in now so curious about everything. He watches and studies faces, pictures, t-shirts...really anything and everything. There is something about his childlike wonder than makes me think about coming to Jesus like a little child and makes me miss that young teenage girl that came to Jesus like a little child feeling like He was all that I had,wanted, and needed in the world. I was passionate, bold, and intentional. I miss that girl and feel like sometimes I hardly recognize her anymore. It was that relationship with Jesus that lead me towards a Christian school, to work Christian camps, to meet and marry a godly man, and even attend seminary and somehow in all of those things I feel like in some ways I've just lost that intimate, personal relationship with my Creator that I so need. Praise Him that He continues to use the events and circumstances of life to draw us to Himself.

I heard this song on XM yesterday morning after watching this sermon and felt like it just summed up exactly where I am at right now. This is my prayer right now - to Rediscover Him.

Rediscover You by Starfield:

I need to just admit
my faith is paper thin
I'm feeling so burned out
On religion

I say an empty prayer
I sing a tired song
I need to just admit that the passion's gone

And I want to get it back

You told me
Look for You and I will find
So I'm here
Like I'm searching for the first time
Revive me, Jesus
Make this cold heart start to move
Help me rediscover You

I want to learn to pray
The way that David prayed
I want my soul to burn when I hear Your name
I want to feel like new
I want to hunger for you
Bring me back to life like only You can do
Cause I don't want to stay the same

You told me
Look for You and I will find
So I'm here
Like I'm searching for the first time
Revive me, Jesus
Make this cold heart start to move
Help me rediscover You

Lord, I want to be Yours today
I want to know the passion of the saints
And how they were changed

You told me
Look for You and I will find
So I'm here
Like I'm searching for the first time
Revive me, Jesus
Make this cold heart start to move

I want to burn for You
Bring me back to life, Jesus
Help me rediscover You