There is a very special someone in my life that has not been getting nearly the blog time that he used to since our adorable little man entered the scene a little over a year ago now. So, since it's Valentine's Day it only seemed natural to devote a little time on the blog to my love and my best friend. :) Hope you enjoy. :)
I have always been a hopeless romantic. I'm not sure when exactly it began or if it's just the way I've always been. I just remember from an early age reading books and watching movies about fairytales with princesses that always ended in "happily ever after." I loved to watch the prince and princess end up together and just knew that I was going to have that...one day. I couldn't waitto find my prince for my prince to find me so that we could "live happily ever after" like I always dreamed. :)
My prince did find me. In the Spring of 2006 while I was a senior in college. (He was one of few very serious boyfriends that I had, but unfortunately I did date some "frogs" before our story began .) Our first correspondence wasn't a love letter but a facebook message (oh, the joys of modern technology!). I don't remember what it said exactly but it was mostly small talk about how we would be working together that upcoming summer at M-Fuge Philadelphia. I was actually supposed to be on staff at a different camp that summer, but I was moved to the Philadelphia camp which started later so that I would still be able to be a bridesmaid in my friends', Brad and Libby's, May wedding (Thank you precious Brock's for letting me be a part of your special day for multiple reasons!).
Our first meeting was actually a few months before camp. My friend, Jamie Lee, and I were interviewing for teaching positions in Alabama (very close to where Stephen happened to live) and I agreed to meet Stephen for lunch at Zaxby's to get to know each other better. My prince drove up in a white honda (not exactly the white horse I had envisioned but, hey, close enough) and I guess as the saying goes "the rest is history." We didn't hit it off right away. Not even close. I was so oblivious and missed basically every, single signal that Stephen tried to give me to show that he was interested. But I am actually thankful for the way it all happened - thankful for the solid friendship that we were able to build over the next few months and in just the right time I found myself head-over-heels, crazy about Stephen and didn't even know how or when it had happened. We began "officially" dating in August of 2006 and were engaged on December 8, 2006. We were married on March 24, 2007. I think that classifies as a "whirlwind romance!" I know some people probably shook their heads and said that we didn't even know each other (and maybe that's true), but we made a choice on March 24, 2007 and a commitment to God to love each other through it all and to fight for our marriage. And to never give up.
One day during our engagement while browsing a Christian bookstore, we came across a stone plaque in the shape of a shield. It had a cross in the center with the words "Be Strong in the Lord" etched on it and the words of Ephesians 6:10-18 etched around the cross:10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
Stephen made a comment about how much he liked the plaque, and I made a mental note of it. (I have learned over the last 4 years of marriage that if he tells me he likes something to be sure and remember it, because he doesn't ask/hint for things very often.) As our wedding day approached and I was thinking about what I should give him for a wedding gift, I knew that I wanted the gift to be meaningful and something that he would treasure for years to come. I remembered the stone shield that he had shown such an interest in that day in the Christian bookstore. I went back and bought it and wrote this poem to go along with it:
Be strong in the Lord
As you take my hand and my heart
And we start a marriage
In which we never will part
Be strong in the Lord
As we begin each new day
And seek first our God
So that we won't go astray
Be strong in the Lord
As we grow in His love
And remember our marriage
Is a gift from above
Be strong in the Lord
When we have our first fight
With patience and love
Any wrong we'll make right
Be strong in the Lord
When we're struggling and poor
If we have each other
We need nothing more
Be strong in the Lord
As our first baby we hold
God's gracious loan of sweet life
To shape and to mold
Be strong in the Lord
On days that we dance with delight
A life spent together
So incredibly right
Be strong in the Lord
As time passes us by
No matter the season
I'll stay by your side
Be strong in the Lord
For all of our days
At the end of our journey
Still we'll give Him our praise
That poem is framed and hangs on a wall in our bedroom beside the stone shield. There have been many days that I've glanced at the poem and have recognized how a stanza speaks to exactly where we are at the moment and I smile to myself as I walk by it remembering the commitment that we made. And if I'm just being honest, there are also days that I've wanted to throw that poem across the room I've been so mad. Because what no one ever told us hopeless romantics all the days we got lost in dreaming about our prince charming when we were little girls, is that marriage isn't easy. It's difficult - very difficult sometimes. It's about making a choice to love through it all. It's about fighting for our marriage. It's about never giving up.
It always bothered me that all those romantic movies that I loved growing up never showed the rest of the story and the events that happened after the couple fell in love. But I guess even the most romantic of us all eventually come to find out that what happens after a couple falls in love is not always the kind of story that people would want to watch. No one wants to document that their prince or princess snores, or has morning breath, or looks different without their makeup on. No one takes pictures of the days in sweatpants and t-shirts with their hair beyond untamable. And we never invite our friends over when our house is adorned with stacks of unwashed dishes in the sink and unfolded clothes on the floor. We rarely talk about our disagreements and the moments that we were clearly at our very worst, but share about the happy, joyous times. And I think that's normal. But I have come to know also that it's the tough moments, the trying times, the untold and unseen events in a marriage that make the sweet moments even sweeter. It's been those moments that have made our love grow stronger and deeper. It's those moments that have made me bear down, grit my teeth, and stand firm in the commitment that we made to each other and to God that have made me love and appreciate Stephen more today than I did four years ago when our marriage had just begun.
My friend, Libby Brock, (the same friend that in a way had a hand in Stephen and I even knowing each other today) took these pictures yesterday. I love these pictures of our family and what we have become four years later. I love that we documented in photographs a joyful time outdoors with our son that is growing so quickly. And even though most days we don't look like this or dress like this and many days we don't act like this - it's still us and it's still who we are just at our best...or at least our better. And it's a sweet day captured in photographs that is even sweeter because of all the tough days that were and will be scattered along the journey - the days of tears, trials, fears, disappointments, loss, and uncertainty.
I have always been a hopeless romantic. I'm not sure when exactly it began or if it's just the way I've always been. I just remember from an early age reading books and watching movies about fairytales with princesses that always ended in "happily ever after." I loved to watch the prince and princess end up together and just knew that I was going to have that...one day. I couldn't wait
My prince did find me. In the Spring of 2006 while I was a senior in college. (He was one of few very serious boyfriends that I had, but unfortunately I did date some "frogs" before our story began .) Our first correspondence wasn't a love letter but a facebook message (oh, the joys of modern technology!). I don't remember what it said exactly but it was mostly small talk about how we would be working together that upcoming summer at M-Fuge Philadelphia. I was actually supposed to be on staff at a different camp that summer, but I was moved to the Philadelphia camp which started later so that I would still be able to be a bridesmaid in my friends', Brad and Libby's, May wedding (Thank you precious Brock's for letting me be a part of your special day for multiple reasons!).
Our first meeting was actually a few months before camp. My friend, Jamie Lee, and I were interviewing for teaching positions in Alabama (very close to where Stephen happened to live) and I agreed to meet Stephen for lunch at Zaxby's to get to know each other better. My prince drove up in a white honda (not exactly the white horse I had envisioned but, hey, close enough) and I guess as the saying goes "the rest is history." We didn't hit it off right away. Not even close. I was so oblivious and missed basically every, single signal that Stephen tried to give me to show that he was interested. But I am actually thankful for the way it all happened - thankful for the solid friendship that we were able to build over the next few months and in just the right time I found myself head-over-heels, crazy about Stephen and didn't even know how or when it had happened. We began "officially" dating in August of 2006 and were engaged on December 8, 2006. We were married on March 24, 2007. I think that classifies as a "whirlwind romance!" I know some people probably shook their heads and said that we didn't even know each other (and maybe that's true), but we made a choice on March 24, 2007 and a commitment to God to love each other through it all and to fight for our marriage. And to never give up.
One day during our engagement while browsing a Christian bookstore, we came across a stone plaque in the shape of a shield. It had a cross in the center with the words "Be Strong in the Lord" etched on it and the words of Ephesians 6:10-18 etched around the cross:10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
Stephen made a comment about how much he liked the plaque, and I made a mental note of it. (I have learned over the last 4 years of marriage that if he tells me he likes something to be sure and remember it, because he doesn't ask/hint for things very often.) As our wedding day approached and I was thinking about what I should give him for a wedding gift, I knew that I wanted the gift to be meaningful and something that he would treasure for years to come. I remembered the stone shield that he had shown such an interest in that day in the Christian bookstore. I went back and bought it and wrote this poem to go along with it:
Be strong in the Lord
As you take my hand and my heart
And we start a marriage
In which we never will part
Be strong in the Lord
As we begin each new day
And seek first our God
So that we won't go astray
Be strong in the Lord
As we grow in His love
And remember our marriage
Is a gift from above
Be strong in the Lord
When we have our first fight
With patience and love
Any wrong we'll make right
Be strong in the Lord
When we're struggling and poor
If we have each other
We need nothing more
Be strong in the Lord
As our first baby we hold
God's gracious loan of sweet life
To shape and to mold
Be strong in the Lord
On days that we dance with delight
A life spent together
So incredibly right
Be strong in the Lord
As time passes us by
No matter the season
I'll stay by your side
Be strong in the Lord
For all of our days
At the end of our journey
Still we'll give Him our praise
That poem is framed and hangs on a wall in our bedroom beside the stone shield. There have been many days that I've glanced at the poem and have recognized how a stanza speaks to exactly where we are at the moment and I smile to myself as I walk by it remembering the commitment that we made. And if I'm just being honest, there are also days that I've wanted to throw that poem across the room I've been so mad. Because what no one ever told us hopeless romantics all the days we got lost in dreaming about our prince charming when we were little girls, is that marriage isn't easy. It's difficult - very difficult sometimes. It's about making a choice to love through it all. It's about fighting for our marriage. It's about never giving up.
It always bothered me that all those romantic movies that I loved growing up never showed the rest of the story and the events that happened after the couple fell in love. But I guess even the most romantic of us all eventually come to find out that what happens after a couple falls in love is not always the kind of story that people would want to watch. No one wants to document that their prince or princess snores, or has morning breath, or looks different without their makeup on. No one takes pictures of the days in sweatpants and t-shirts with their hair beyond untamable. And we never invite our friends over when our house is adorned with stacks of unwashed dishes in the sink and unfolded clothes on the floor. We rarely talk about our disagreements and the moments that we were clearly at our very worst, but share about the happy, joyous times. And I think that's normal. But I have come to know also that it's the tough moments, the trying times, the untold and unseen events in a marriage that make the sweet moments even sweeter. It's been those moments that have made our love grow stronger and deeper. It's those moments that have made me bear down, grit my teeth, and stand firm in the commitment that we made to each other and to God that have made me love and appreciate Stephen more today than I did four years ago when our marriage had just begun.
My friend, Libby Brock, (the same friend that in a way had a hand in Stephen and I even knowing each other today) took these pictures yesterday. I love these pictures of our family and what we have become four years later. I love that we documented in photographs a joyful time outdoors with our son that is growing so quickly. And even though most days we don't look like this or dress like this and many days we don't act like this - it's still us and it's still who we are just at our best...or at least our better. And it's a sweet day captured in photographs that is even sweeter because of all the tough days that were and will be scattered along the journey - the days of tears, trials, fears, disappointments, loss, and uncertainty.
Stephen,
I am so thankful that God has allowed me to be your wife. I am thankful for the selfless way that you strive to love me and I pray that God would continue to teach me how to love you selflessly and unconditionally. I am thankful for the gift of marriage and that on the hard days and happy days (and every day in between) you are by my side. You are a good husband, a loving husband, a faithful husband. You are a wonderful friend and father. You have the heart of a servant. When I think about this verse, I think about you: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." (Ephesians 5:25) I pray that we will continue to "be strong in the Lord" on this journey together, and I pray that our love with continue to grow throughout all the years that God grants us together on this earth. I love you!
F.M.W.L.
Love, Your Kassi Bee
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